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by anonyreaderfan
Summary: A short one shot describing an imaginary scene between Jedikiah and John after Roger wakes up


Disclaimer: The Tomorrow People is the property of the CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

~ X ~

Jedikiah had been there when Roger woke, the first one his brother saw. They exchanged an enthusiastic but careful hug mindful of Roger's delicate state. They had grasped hands, Jedikiah's grip gentle, Roger's still weak, congratulating each other on their success. They finally ran out of words and were content to just stare into each other's eyes. It was time to leave his brother to Stephen's and Marla's tender care. Time to let them get acquainted and reacquainted.

He stepped back from the makeshift stretcher. Roger's family deserved time with him, and he needed to be with his family. He looked around searching the small groups of two and three hanging around the railings gawking and gossiping. Not seeing the one he was looking for, he approached Cara, leaning against a wall apart from the others. "Where's John?"

She hesitated, unfolding her arms and straightening up, before slowly saying, "He left when Roger woke."

Jedikiah waited and then prompted her. "So where did he go?"

She eyed him cautiously before replying. "He just walked off. I called to him, but he ignored me. Didn't answer." She bit her lip. "I don't know . . . maybe you better leave him alone. He's trying to deal with a lot right now."

Jedikiah, still dressed in a scrub gown, pushed it forward to put his hands in his pockets, nodding to let her know he understood. "I can help him."

Cara met his eyes, a doubtful expression on her face. "You're part of his confusion."

"Then I'm the one to help clear it up. He didn't turn to you." The hurt look on her face made him want to take back his words, but before he could apologize she coldly pointed. "Follow this narrow area out. Just keep turning right, even when it gets dark. You'll go by a couple of areas lit just by red lights. He goes there when he's upset."

"Thank you."

His thanks didn't soften her now stony face. She looked away without acknowledging his words.

_I'm gonna have to mend some fences there if she and John stay together_. Jedikiah knew he had earned no points with her. It was damp down here, and the air was chilly the further you got away from the living quarters. The metal railings were rusted in spots and cold. He heard dripping water_. What a God awful place to live._ His first thought was followed by a horrified second one. _Oh God, I wonder how long I'll be stuck down here?_

He kept moving until he came around a corner and spotted John sitting on the edge of a gray metal platform. There was a three rail barrier at the edge, and he faced it, leaning the front of his body against it, legs under the lowest railing dangling off the edge of the platform. He was looking through the bars, and at first glance you could easily imagine he was a prisoner looking out of a cell yearning to be free. The illusion stopped Jedikiah short. _What is it he wants to be free off?_ He shook himself, recovering, and walked down a slight ramp in front of the raised dais to face him.

He looked at John's somber face and smiled. "Why the long face? He's talking. He'll be walking in no time. He's asking for you. You didn't kill him, John. He's alive." His voice rang with joy and he repeated, "He's alive."

John took his time answering. "Yeah, I saw."

Jedikiah was puzzled by John's lack of reaction. "You're vindicated, kid." He stood watching him, but the melancholy face didn't change. "What's wrong?" he asked softly. "You should be happy."

John shrugged. "I'm glad he's alive. When he first moved I wanted to shout and dance. Him being alive was all I could think about. I couldn't look beyond that. But then once I knew it was true . . . well, then I really started to think, and it finally sunk in." He looked to Jedikiah for confirmation. "He knew I was sent to kill him. He was in on it with you."

Jedikiah stripped off the scrub gown, rolling it up into a ball, and chucking it. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Yeah, we planned it. We knew we had to do it. We knew you could do it. You were the one we needed." Jedikiah pulled his hands out spreading them in a plea for understanding. "We had no choice."

John sighed, shifting position. "See that's what I can't get my head around. The two people I was closest to. The two people I cared about most." He gave a sad huff. "The two people in this world I actually thought gave a damn about me." He shook his head from side to side confused, and then looked Jedikiah in the face. "You . . . both of you used me. You let me . . . No . . . You set me up to do something that made me sick . . . made me hate myself. You made my life a living hell. Let me stew in it for six years.

His eyes shone with the gleam of tears, but his voice stayed matter-of-fact. "See, that's what I can't get over." He made a face. "That guilt I lived with, had to constantly hide, ruined my relationship with Cara."

Jedikiah opened his mouth, but John put up a hand forestalling him. "Oh, we've tried to work it through. We've patched it up. But something got damaged when she realized what I held back. There's a scar that will never disappear."

John put his two hands on the railing, leaning backwards arms straight out, head hanging down between them. "How do you do that to someone you're supposed to care about? And then . . . and then you ask me if you're forgiven?"

He straightened back up, looking at Jedikiah, his brow wrinkled in disbelief. "So, that's it? You say 'sorry' and it's all over?"

"I never liked what I did to you, but it had to be done. The world was at stake and sacrifices had to be made. We robbed Marla and the boys of their husband and father. They suffered too." Jedikiah gestured with his hands passionately willing John to understand.

"Yeah, but they had each other. They knew someone cared about them. They had a clear conscience. They didn't live everyday knowing they were a murderer. They didn't feel like a piece of their soul died." John swallowed painfully.

Jedikiah turned around, leaning his back against the railing next to John, crossing his legs at the ankles, arms folded across his chest. "I was never sure I could bring Roger back. I killed him as much as you did. He never saw his kids grow up. He wasn't sure he could come back. The point is everyone suffered, John."

"But you knew why you were doing it, and you make the choice. You weren't a pawn in someone's chess game." John crossed his arms on the railing and laid his head down on them, looking away from Jedikiah.

They stayed that way, John resting his head on his arms, Jedikiah leaning on the railing, next to him.

After awhile, Jedikiah put out a gentle hand ruffling the light brown hair. "You've always been searching for a home. What you don't realize is that home isn't a place. People are, and I've always been home to you. It's time to finally come home, kid. We need to get over this and move on."

John stayed silent allowing Jedikiah's hand to remain on his hair.

Finally he sighed and slowly straightened up, letting Jedikiah's hand slide off his head of its own accord. He swung his legs up on the platform and agilely got to his feet. Instead of going to the end of the platform and walking down the steps, he vaulted over the railing to lightly land on his feet next to Jedikiah.

He faced him, hands loosely hanging at his sides. He tilted his head regarding the man who had directed the course of almost his entire life. "It's time for me to accept the fact that I never had a home. Probably never will. It is time to move on."

John stuck his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket and walked away.

Jedikiah stayed where he was, staring straight ahead. He compressed his lips, nodding his head slowly, trying to absorb the mental blow. He swallowed painfully, willing back tears.

A deep indrawn breath, and then he straightened his back. He had never accepted defeat before and now was not the time to start. His face displayed his determination. _I got my brother back. I'll get the kid back._

He retraced his steps heading towards the main living area ready to start his next campaign.

~ FIN ~


End file.
